Now 12 plus am already.
Birthday over.
Why parent will forget about my birthday?
Issit i'm not important or i'm just nothing in their heart?
Just now thought of commit suicide.
Forget my birthday nevermind but mum say does hurtful thing.
Am i their real blood daughter?
I been asking myself this question for year.
I never once feel that i'm one of them.
Never did i feel loved by this family.
I really feel like commit suicide.
So i won't feel sad & unhappy.
Why can't they let me feel loved in this family.
Anything goes wrong, i would be the one scolded by father.
Even if is sister wrong, i'm the one who get scolded.
I have been unhappy for day & noone know.
Mother alway thought that i trying to run away from work cause of him.
But no matter how much i explain, she keep on repeat that i don't work cause of him.
I don't know what i suppose to do nor say already.
I gave up.
I no longer could stand it.
I could say that if i really cmi, i would commit suicide.
I promise i will.
I'm soo left out.
My family alway make me think that they are one family instead of me in it.
I really don't know what to do.
Why should me be the one who suffer from this?
Friend & family are the same.
Friend make me feel soo extra and left out just like my family.
I soo stress.
I want to run away from all this.
I hope god would take me away.
My birthday wish would be " Please god, take me away from all this and i would be happy."
Now i crying like a mad woman.
Edited Post
I suspect that i might have collen cancer.
Collen cancer have two type.
the two type are Local Colon Cancer and Systemic Colon Cancer.
Symptoms of Local collen cancer are
•Changes in your bowel habits, such as bowel movements that are either more or less frequent than normal
•Constipation (difficulty having a bowel movement or straining to have a bowel movement)
•Diarrhea (loose or watery stools)
•Intermittent (alternating) constipation and diarrhea
•Bright red or dark red blood in your stools or black, dark colored, "tarry" stools
•Stools that are thinner than normal ("pencil stools") or feeling as if you cannot empty your bowels completely
•Abdominal (midsection) discomfort, bloating, frequent gas pains, or cramps
Symptoms of Systemic collen cancer are
•Unintentional weight loss (losing weight when not dieting or trying to lose weight)
•Loss of appetite
•Unexplained fatigue (extreme tiredness)
•Nausea or vomiting
•Anemia (low red blood cell count or low iron in your red blood cells)
•Jaundice (yellow color to the skin and whites of the eyes)
I have some of the Symptoms such as
•Bright red or dark red blood in your stools or black, dark colored, "tarry" stools
•Diarrhea (loose or watery stools)
•Abdominal (midsection) discomfort, bloating, frequent gas pains, or cramps
•Unexplained fatigue (extreme tiredness)
I just woke up not long and now i feeling sleepy again.
I keep telling myself that cannot be de.
Even if yes, that great.
Can die early.
Birthday over.
Why parent will forget about my birthday?
Issit i'm not important or i'm just nothing in their heart?
Just now thought of commit suicide.
Forget my birthday nevermind but mum say does hurtful thing.
Am i their real blood daughter?
I been asking myself this question for year.
I never once feel that i'm one of them.
Never did i feel loved by this family.
I really feel like commit suicide.
So i won't feel sad & unhappy.
Why can't they let me feel loved in this family.
Anything goes wrong, i would be the one scolded by father.
Even if is sister wrong, i'm the one who get scolded.
I have been unhappy for day & noone know.
Mother alway thought that i trying to run away from work cause of him.
But no matter how much i explain, she keep on repeat that i don't work cause of him.
I don't know what i suppose to do nor say already.
I gave up.
I no longer could stand it.
I could say that if i really cmi, i would commit suicide.
I promise i will.
I'm soo left out.
My family alway make me think that they are one family instead of me in it.
I really don't know what to do.
Why should me be the one who suffer from this?
Friend & family are the same.
Friend make me feel soo extra and left out just like my family.
I soo stress.
I want to run away from all this.
I hope god would take me away.
My birthday wish would be " Please god, take me away from all this and i would be happy."
Now i crying like a mad woman.
Edited Post
I suspect that i might have collen cancer.
Collen cancer have two type.
the two type are Local Colon Cancer and Systemic Colon Cancer.
Symptoms of Local collen cancer are
•Changes in your bowel habits, such as bowel movements that are either more or less frequent than normal
•Constipation (difficulty having a bowel movement or straining to have a bowel movement)
•Diarrhea (loose or watery stools)
•Intermittent (alternating) constipation and diarrhea
•Bright red or dark red blood in your stools or black, dark colored, "tarry" stools
•Stools that are thinner than normal ("pencil stools") or feeling as if you cannot empty your bowels completely
•Abdominal (midsection) discomfort, bloating, frequent gas pains, or cramps
Symptoms of Systemic collen cancer are
•Unintentional weight loss (losing weight when not dieting or trying to lose weight)
•Loss of appetite
•Unexplained fatigue (extreme tiredness)
•Nausea or vomiting
•Anemia (low red blood cell count or low iron in your red blood cells)
•Jaundice (yellow color to the skin and whites of the eyes)
I have some of the Symptoms such as
•Bright red or dark red blood in your stools or black, dark colored, "tarry" stools
•Diarrhea (loose or watery stools)
•Abdominal (midsection) discomfort, bloating, frequent gas pains, or cramps
•Unexplained fatigue (extreme tiredness)
I just woke up not long and now i feeling sleepy again.
I keep telling myself that cannot be de.
Even if yes, that great.
Can die early.
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